Sundays With Cawd - 4 footer

What even is the teardown house? Do people actually get paid to steal all the materials and possible goods left behind in a house and then knock a few walls down?

This sounds like a job I would love to get.

My greatest fear in life is that I'm as boring as Lorne and just don't realize it.

I cannot fathom what it's like to exist as him. I'm reminded of Puddy from Seinfeld just staring off blankly into space, but Puddy had a career, interests and a gurlfren. Lorne seems likes he's barely even sentient when left to his own devices.

And yet he had the audacity to get angry with Jamie after ASKING her if she got bored talking to him!

Also that shit in this call about poking the fetus with his cawk to help initiate labor was fawking disgusting. (said in the sing songy way Lorne tells Debbie Angelo is disgusting lol) I know self awareness is far too much to expect from him, but how much he still doesnt realize he shouldnt make any sexual comments with even the vaguest of relation to children floors me.

The arrangement was lorne would level the house and rip up the foundation, in exchange lorne could keep anything in the house including parts of the house itself with the exception of windows and counter tops.

I know I'm not. I know this because people always want to talk to me and it's fucking annoying.

I'm great at interactions because I ask questions, don't overload people with detail, keep my sentences short and light with brevity and self-deprecation.

The problem with that is I have to listen to people yap for much longer than I would if I bombarded them back.

I think everyone should analyse the ratio of how much they speak vs how much the other person speaks during a conversation. If you're talking more than 70% of the time then chances are you're fucking boring and annoying. 

The fetus thing is enough.

This vile old man has the thought and audacity to say he's going to essentially sexually assault his own unborn baby.

As a joke? To whom? The mother of the child? Who is also half his age?

Obviously this is a thought he has had for years and years... even before Kayla Marie Armstrong.

Hence why he never has or will learn anything.

His desire to harm a child sexually is insane. Even one not even born yet.

And he thinks it's funny and feasible.

Gives a new meaning to the old Lorneism "I wish I were sticking it in you right now"

I felt so disgusted listening to him say that. I'm sure had the Robot indulged in the convo.. Lorne would have gone down a rabbit hole of his vile fantasy.

Should’ve told him to destroy the windows and countertops, and leave the house and everything else alone. The dumbass would’ve destroyed the house and left the windows and countertops alone.

He also thinks that a 5 year old, used ladder is worth $500. Did he think it was worth $500 when he bought it from Fahmah for $10? He clearly doesn't know that in the EXTREMELY unlikely event that the Sheriff would do a god damn thing, he'd only be legally entitled to what he payed for it AT MOST. There's no way he'd get a $500 claim without proof that he paid $500.

The old adage “every accusation is a confession” is Lorne to a “t”. He’s always throwing out accusations that the catfish ignoring him, calling him out on his behavior, etc. is part of some secret plan to dump him or whatever. This is because Lorne is always scheming and trying to fuck people over. It’s what he does so he projects it onto others. This ladder shit is another example. It’s all a scam but he’s dumb as toast so he failed as usual.

I mean, in all fairness, there's money in those materials and the other stuff left in the house especially if you're a guy doing lots of construction of your own (Lorne obviously never gets anything done and he's probably too stupid to know the copper pipes are more lucrative than the windows, but nonetheless).

I can imagine he took everything he thought he needed or could re-sell and then just said the job was done and fucked off.

I was fucking astonished (though I guess I shouldn't have been) when he made that original "joke," it either fell flat or wasn't acknowledged, he had a solid 20 seconds to think about what he'd just said and either walk it back or, at best, let it die, and instead he demands her attention and repeats it.

Does anyone in that county check people's references before trusting them to do work?